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The road to motherhood that infertility built

Who would have thought that I would one day be grateful for the gift of infertility?
And yet I am.

If not for my infertility I would have never known what an incredible miracle it is to be blessed with a child. It is not something to be taken for granted. Nor is it something to dread or fear; Or something to terminate or feel inconvenienced by. No, it is something to cherish. And it is sadly something some women, no matter how badly they desire it, will never experience.

If not for my infertility I would have never known that I truly can cast all my cares to Him. I would never have known that He desires the best for me and truly desires to give me all the desires of my heart.

If not for my infertility I wouldn’t be the mother I am today and the mother I desire to be tomorrow.

If not for my infertility I wouldn’t have met, befriended, cried with (and for) the incredible women who are a part of this sisterhood—the infertile ones. Some have crossed the finish line, some gave up, and some are still trudging along with their eyes ahead and their arms empty.

There are in fact many roads to motherhood.
My path may have been the least desirable.
The streets are wet with tears and cracked by many a broken heart.
But it was worth it all, this road to motherhood that infertility built.
And I will be forever grateful to have traveled it.

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  1. I agree! I had a somewhat different outcome, but still, grateful for the journey!
    People who don’t “get it” look at me funny when I talk about being grateful. You too?

  2. ChinaMama,
    By different outcome I think you mean your path lead to adoption and mine to IVF? I just like to think that we both traveled the path and both were lucky enough to become mothers…and we both have our REAL children. Still, smarting from the fact people could ask you if your daughters are *really* sisters. Although someone recently told them a relative asked if they ever thought about trying to have their OWN child some day…as if their adopted child wasn’t THEIR child.

  3. Oh, I SO did not mean to imply that our FINAL outcome was different. I guess what I meant to say is that we both reached the same destination. We just took different paths to get there! Regardless, I believe that we were both blessed by these journeys we traveled, though we may not have felt that way while in the midst of it! Anyway, I sure do appreciate your perspective. It’s important to raise awareness of the MANY ways God creates families!

  4. I hope some day I can have the same outlook as you. Right now, I’m the one with a road covered in tears.

  5. (((Megan))) I remember this so clearly. I wish there were other words I could offer you as comfort. But having been there, I know there are few words that can bring that. I guess I can only try to hold myself out there for you as a lantern of hope on that road of tears. Infertile me has 4 children. Why not you? I have to believe you will find your way off the wet road of tears and into the sunshine (with occasional showers) of motherhood! I have to believe you’ll be joining me on the other side and I look forward to that.

  6. Wow. I’ve been thinking about infertility alot since it is getting close to the time where the big hubby and I start trying. I am scared to death that something will go wrong. But I’ve been waiting to have kids for 7 years now so I know I will be thankful for whatever happens, wether we have one of our own or adopt. I want to be a mom so bad!

  7. There are so many women struggling with this issue that it is almost epidemic. I am very lucky that I had no problems having kids and realize that now. If I did not have my kids I would be lost. I can understand why many women with infertility get down and depressed. So, I appreciate being able to have my kids very very much.

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